I'm eating all of the evidence.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
it's like heaven, but drunker
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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