if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
