Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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