Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize