Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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