Whod you bang
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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