Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(623): View more from Arizona

Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?

(1-623): View more from Arizona

Um.. is it mean if I say yes?

(623): View more from Arizona

How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"

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(623): Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years? (1-623): Um.. is it mean if I say yes? (623): How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?" http://tfl.nu/602v

Replies (35) Good night (663) Bad night (2376)
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(619): View more from California

well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen

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(619): well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen http://tfl.nu/rvwe

Replies (42) Good night (1002) Bad night (5281)
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(440): View more from Ohio

Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.

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(440): Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them. http://tfl.nu/0bl8

Replies (13) Good night (961) Bad night (4978)
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(815): View more from Illinois

i don't really know how much tequila is too much

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(815): i don't really know how much tequila is too much http://tfl.nu/p5o7

Replies (16) Good night (4361) Bad night (1591)
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(641): View more from Iowa

just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now

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(641): just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now http://tfl.nu/052c

Replies (12) Good night (5023) Bad night (1242)
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(616): View more from Michigan

he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing

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(616): he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing http://tfl.nu/m3tl

Replies (8) Good night (2167) Bad night (802)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.

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(978): I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened. http://tfl.nu/wamv

Replies (11) Good night (2485) Bad night (1206)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.

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(704): We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms. http://tfl.nu/m17c

Replies (6) Good night (2975) Bad night (528)
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(812): View more from Indiana

I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you

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(812): I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you http://tfl.nu/vw2w

Replies (15) Good night (1841) Bad night (550)
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(914): View more from New York

The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.

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(914): The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes. http://tfl.nu/xsso

Replies (8) Good night (1049) Bad night (397)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.

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(920): I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months. http://tfl.nu/4vnx

Replies (4) Good night (558) Bad night (468)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.

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(306): That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives. http://tfl.nu/0tdc

Replies (5) Good night (426) Bad night (210)
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(208): View more from Idaho

Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.

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(208): Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache. http://tfl.nu/ndot

Replies (1) Good night (234) Bad night (360)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol

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(306): so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol http://tfl.nu/scq5

Replies (1) Good night (275) Bad night (268)
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(847): View more from Illinois

there was so much lube in my brother's closet...

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(847): there was so much lube in my brother's closet... http://tfl.nu/yytv

Replies (2) Good night (191) Bad night (596)

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