Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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