I'm drive I can fine osifer
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
