Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize