New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
