Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
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