i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
