you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
