i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
