I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I'm sobbing to NWA
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
