Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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