Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
