I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize