I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize