Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
