is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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