do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Randomize
