You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
