Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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