After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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