So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
