mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
He did a backflip because drugs
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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