Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
