I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
