how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I will pee on everything he values.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
