oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
