I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
