just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
