I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
