It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
