I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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