oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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