She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
