yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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