Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
