A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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