So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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