well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
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I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
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did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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