dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize