I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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