Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
