There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
