Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
