hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
